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Ashton Kutcher Predicts Worthless Currency And Mass Panic, Recommends Getting As Hot As Possible

Courtney Comstock
Business Insider
Thursday, December 30, 2010

Ashton Kutcher has an interesting theory about why you should get as fit as possible in 2011.

According to Kutcher, the apocalypse is coming.

Last year, if you’ll remember, at the beginning of 2010, it was Barton Biggs who recommended people prepare for the apocalypse.

Our society has peaked, Biggs said, and the end of days, which is near, will bring nothing but crazy pillagers to your home to take everything you own.

Kutcher’s theory is a lot more badass. The mass-panic he pictures is in the form of zero electricity, followed by pillagers and … wild boar? (You’ll have to read what he says.) To prepare for it, he’s doing a crazy ultimate survival-style get-fit routine in case he has to fight off hoards of people (or father the next generation).

He also has updated the preparation tactics for the new year. Biggs’ tips for 2010 were to buy a farmhouse and stock it with plenty of guns, seed fertilizer, wine, medicine, etc.

Kutcher’s tips are to beef up. According to Just Jared, he told Men’s Fitness that he’s learning killer fighting if for nothing else than to protect the ones he loves for the worst case scenario.

Ashton Kutcher to Men’s Fitness: It won’t take very much, I’m telling you. It will not take much for people to hit the panic button. The amount of convenience that people rely on based on electricity alone.

You start taking out electricity and satellites, and people are going to lose their noodle. People don’t have maps anymore. People use their iPhones or GPS systems, so if there’s no electricity, nobody has maps.

And people are going to go, ‘That land’s not yours, prove that it’s yours,’ and the only thing you have to prove it’s yours is on an electric file. Then it’s like, ‘What’s the value of currency, and whose food is whose?’ People’s alarm systems at their homes will no longer work. Neither will our heating, our garbage disposals, hot-water heaters that run on gas but depend on electricity – what happens when all our modern conveniences fail? I’m going to be ready to take myself and my family to a safe place where they don’t have to worry.

All of my physical fitness regimen is completely tailored around the end of day. I stay fit for no other reason than to save the people I care about.

According to Huff Po, Kutcher is stocking up on guns and spending hours and hours running the canyons near his home, pushed on by visions of being chased by wild boar. He’s also taking daily bikram yoga sessions, and learning Krav Maga, a deadly Israeli combat technique taught to high-powered special ops.

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